Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Acid is not a monday night drug
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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