I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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