Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
