Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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