you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
