haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
it wasn't lemon gatorade
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
