Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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