i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize
