.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
