Small penises have feelings too.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
