I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
