Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
