I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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