? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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