she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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