And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Randomize
