she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
