she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
