Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
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