He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
i need some magic done to my vagina
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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