i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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