Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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