Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
