I just made out with a guy for $7.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
