happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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