So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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