Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
