real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
my poor anus
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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