I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
