Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
