If that was your dad, he is hot
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize