Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
