My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
