three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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