It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
