Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
