this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Too much gin, very little bucket
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
