ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
