You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
