That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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