So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize