i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
