I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Randomize
