well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
