Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
