I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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