He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
