I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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