This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
