I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
