This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
