Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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